Hope There Aren't Any Emergencies

Our emergency contact sheet is laughable it is so out of date. The only accuarate thing on it is Jake's name and date of birth, and our address. It so desperately needs to be updated, and here's how I know:

Since the last time we updated the sheet:

# of people to contact who have moved out of state: 1
# of families we have not seen in person in over a year: 5
# of divorces:1
# of new families we would actually call in an emergency who are not listed: at least 4
# of people who now go by another name because they hated being called "Betty": 1
# of doctors we no longer see:1
# of medicines now taken, not listed: 3 regularly, 2 others on occasion
# of additional diagnosis: 2
# of diagnosis no longer accurate: 2
# of teaspoons more of Motrin Jake can take now:2
# of schools Jake has attended since the phone number on the list was accurate: 3
# of additional cell phones now in use since list was made: 2
# of changed phone numbers: at least 3 (but then again we haven't talked to some of those people in quite a while.)
# of aides we have gone through since that woman was listed: at least 5
# of different office numbers Descartes has had: probably about 12
# of additional children we now have: 1


only the grandparents and my friend Pollyanna will go unchanged... and Jake's list of allergies goes unchanged too.