So Much to Do

and so few hours while Jake is at summer school. Friday is the last day of summer school, so I feel like I have about 15 more hours to get everything I need to get done for the next two weeks. Jake starts school again in mid-August, so it's not like I need to fill in a whole lot of time, but it's just enough to remind me that outings with both of my children are a rather daunting task.

My stomach just quivered at the thought of trying to take Lucy to swim lessons during those two weeks. Jake hate HATES going there. The giant white dome enclosing a steamy pool and screamy children? What's not to like? Last time I seriously left him in the car playing while I stood at the gate of the swim school, one foot straddling the little line in the cement, demarcating the difference between abandoning my 2 year old with her swim instructor, and leaving an unattended child in a vehicle. At least I had the good parking space. I will not even think about getting Jake's aide here by 8:45am so she can watch him while she swims. I may need to put her lessons on hold for two weeks and risk losing the time slot.

These are the things that people can't even imagine about our lives. The lessons are 30 minutes long. Jake yelled and threw himself down in such a large fashion that he terrified several children parents last time. He looked just enough like he was just throwing a temper tantrum (which indeed he was) that I just looked like a bad mom. That's my favorite. 9am and I suck at being a mom. It is such an awesome way to start the day.

This evening Descartes and I have been trying to figure out additional strategies to get Lucy to sleep. It is 10:44 and she is still awake in her room. This is after a full day at childcare with all 3 and 4 year olds. I thought this more rigorous childcare would get her more tired, but it seems that she is saying more and more often "Mommy. I'm not tired." This was the age that my parents bought me a 3 foot long, 1 foot deep drawer filled with Superscope Storyteller books and a cassette player. I have been buying these vintage tapes and books in anticipation of this day, hoping that the stories and the independence of using the tape machine would provide my busy little girl the same thrill it gave me, but I'm not sure. The stories are closer to Grimm Fairy tales than soft and lovey Dora and Barney stories.

My favorites were Little Mermaid and The Selfish Giant. In the first story there is no Ariel singing with the fish, instead there is a beautiful woman who loves the Prince so much that she kisses his new bride gently on the forehead and throws herself into the sea, tossing away the witch's knife she was given to kill the bride. Instead of a life of further sadness turned to seafoam, she becomes a Daughter of the Air.

"We spread the gentle winds of hope. You, poor Little Mermaid have searched for goodness with all your heart. That is why you have become a daughter of the air."

and apparently, the line that has stuck with me:

"For the Little Mermaid had learned that in the giving of one's self, the greatest reward comes in seeing the happiness of others."

Apparently I remember a lot from my second year of life. I guess I'd better make these last days of summer count. So tomorrow there will be tape recorder buying and Jake to the aquarium planning.